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Somebody Stole My Santa Claus Suit

Randy over on A Voice Wandering In The City asked what your favorite “unusual” Christmas song is and here is mine, Somebody Stole My Santa Claus Suit by the Christmas Jug Band.

Somebody stole my Santa Claus suit.
Somebody ripped off my beard, hat and boots.
Some little fatso is all dressed in red.
He even had the gall to swipe the pillow off my bed.
Now what’s my kids going to think,
If Santas a no-show, well boy, they’ll raise a stink.
But, deck the halls and what the hell,
I still got my jingle bell.
So sucker you can keep the suit,
‘Cause frankly, I don’t give hoot.

Somebody stole my Santa Claus suit.
Somebody ripped off my beard, hat and boots.
Some little fatso is all dressed in red.
He even had the gall to swipe the pillow off my bed.
Now what’s my kids going to think,
If Santas a no-show, well boy, they’ll raise a stink.
But, deck the halls and what the hell,
I still got my jingle bell.
So sucker you can keep the suit,
‘Cause frankly, I don’t give hoot.

But, where oh where is my Santa Claus suit?
That get-up set me back a bundle of loot.
The beard alone was four ninety-eight.
The box it came in was an antique orange crate.
Some body took the whole shabang.
If I find that rolly-polly mother, he’s going to hang.
But gee, I guess that’s no way to be.
He might do some good with it and all, thanks to me.
So sucker you can keep the suit,
‘Cause frankly, I don’t give hoot.

MP3

Good Thing It Was Last Monday

Even if you have forgotten about my cholesterol, my doctor hasn’t. As you can see from the most recent numbers I’m pretty much OK.

  Chol HDL LDL Trig
Goal <200 >31 <100 30-150
12/15/08 167 41 92 171
03/21/08 164 37 104 115
12/12/07 175 38 104 165
07/17/07 185 36 117 162
03/05/07 195 39 123 167
09/19/06 167 37 103 135
04/06/06 168 37 106 126
12/08/05 182 35 120 137
07/28/05 177 30 113 169
06/17/05 164 31 85 238
05/06/05 174 27 108 194
01/10/05 176 33 110 167
09/21/04 209 24 131 271

But it sure was a good thing they took blood early last Monday before last week’s high fat, high calorie snack overloading (which by the way has continued unabated these last two days) because I would be willing to bet my current numbers are a lot higher.

Started up, went down, still down.
Miata Top Transitions since 10/24/08: 79

Skynet Precursor?

The engineer in the cube across from me is working on something for the company’s web site that will allow customers to specially configure the valve they want. Right now you can buy stock valves from the site, but you have to know what you want, this new way will walk you through getting the right product for the right application. Internally this thing is referred to as the configurator, I’m sure marketing will coin some fancier term for it later. He is working with an outside vendor that is doing all the programing and they are not too prompt with their updates and corrections.

This morning I heard him discussing his woes dealing with the programmers and the configurator with another engineer in NJ, when I heard him say, “It never gives you the same answer twice.” Maybe this program has a mind of its own and it gives a different answer depending on its mood.

Started down, went up, still up.
Miata Top Transitions since 10/24/08: 78

NUMB3RS

In the continuing quest for another TV series to start watching, this weekend we auditioned NUMB3RS. Almost. I like most of the actors in the show, separately, but for some reason not together. Did they cast the the super smart mathematician first and then start thinking about who should play his father? One of the producers said I have the perfect person, remember the movie Independence Day? Didn’t Jeff Goldblum play a math genius? Get that guy who played his dad. Did he have a father in those dinosaur movies?

I found the cases, so far, interesting, but, and I know they only have 41 minutes to do it in, the investigative procedures seem to take giant leaps only in the right direction.

And for a show that deals with math and logic why, oh why, would they number the four shows on disc one of season one: 101, 103, 104 & 105?

Started down, went up, back down, still down.
Miata Top Transitions since 10/24/08: 77

I Led You Here, Sir, For I Am Spartacus

While we were riding the tandem to work this morning I saw something or thought of something that I should blog about tonight. Of course I didn’t write it down. On the way home from work the same idea reoccurred, once again I didn’t write it down, so you won’t get to read about it.

It’s holiday time, so there are goodies around practically every corner at work and because I have no self control, I eat something each time I pass something. On Tuesday I started keeping track of all the handfuls of whatnot I consumed, retroactive to Monday, with the though of blogging about that today, but after writing it all down the totals weren’t nearly as spectacular sounding as I imagined, so I scratched that idea.

Even though they play the song That Thing You Do about 10 times in the 1-3/4 hours the movie runs, I still like watching it. And I did again tonight.

One of Ron White’s bits contains this quote: “…once you’ve seen one woman naked, you… wanna see the rest of ’em naked.” I’m not sure what he’d think of these women, or these…

Started down, still down.
Miata Top Transitions since 10/24/08: 73

Sightless Gas

According to a college student I know, carbon monoxide is a dangerous gas because it displaces oxygen, is odorless, tasteless and sightless.

The gift from my Roadsterchat Secret Santa arrived today and it came all the way from Switzerland (not the one in South Carolina either.)

The gift from my Regions Bank (n?e AmSouth) Secret Santa arrived day before yesterday, the title to the Emperor.

I can imagine the tiny little gas molecules with their tiny little hands feeling their way into my lungs…

Started down, still down.
Miata Top Transitions since 10/24/08: 73

Night Before

In my email today I received a politically incorrect Ghetto version of Clement Moore’s ‘Twas The Night Before Christmas. I decided to reply with a different version and a quick Googling led me to just the right one. Yesterday I had read a very legal version over on The Rambling Photos Of A Life Lived. I know somebody over on Miata.net made up a Miata themed one that I though about posting here, but I’ll probably wait until next Wednesday for that if I do it.

All this got me thinking about how it seems that just about every segment of the population has it’s own variation. Turns out a fellow named Matthew Monroe collected as many as he could find back a couple years ago and came up with 849 (and that doesn’t include the ghetto or Miata versions.) Find your favorite to pass amongst yourselves HERE.

Started down, still down.
Miata Top Transitions since 10/24/08: 73