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FM

Today while over run­ning the Master’s Miata Club’s newslet­ter through the postage meter at the dealer, I men­tioned the ugly spots on the out­side rearview mir­rors to the sales­man and he said, “I know just what you need.” We walked around back to the detail­ing area and he grabbed a white bot­tle with no label on it. Poured some clear vis­cous fluid on a white rag. We went back over to where the car was parked and he swirled some on the mir­ror, let it sit while he swirled some on the other mir­ror. Got a clean rag and wiped/rubbed off the stuff from both mir­rors. Spots all gone.

When I asked him what it was, he said, “I don’t know, we call it ‘water spot remover’.”

I call it Fuck­ing Magic

Toilet Stall Entertainment

This morn­ing while sit­ting in a stall at work (I always go at work. Why do it at home when you can get paid for it?) I noticed a fin­ger­nail clip­ping lay­ing near my shoe. At first, I was some­what repulsed, but then mar­veled at the nicely sym­met­ri­cal nature of the clip­ping. It was kind of large, so it must have been a thumb.…crap! Did it just move? Naw, I must be hal­lu­ci­nat­ing. No wait, there it goes again. WTF? It is then I notice that there is a tiny lit­tle ant under one end. He is valiantly try­ing to get that sucker back to all his bud­dies back in Antville. First he swings it one way, then back another. He is strug­gling might­ily. I watch trans­fixed for a cou­ple of min­utes while he makes very lit­tle orga­nized progress, he keeps at it, so there must be some good food stuck to the nail. My busi­ness is fin­ished, so I leave the ant to his. That was much more enter­tain­ing than the occa­sional folded up sports page.…

Minty Fresh

When I posted my query about the per­ma­nent water spots on my mir­rors over on the Miata.net forum I got one response: “I used Meguire’s Num­ber 7 pol­ish fol­lowed by Meguire’s Gold Class car wax.” Hav­ing nei­ther of these prod­ucts, but it got me think­ing, what else I could use? I remem­bered that tooth­paste is a very low abra­sive that can be used as a light pol­ish. So I took a tube out to the garage and swirled away for a while then washed with Windex.

I don’t think it worked very well, but at least my mir­rors smell minty fresh. :-)

Baby Gets A Bath

Finally bought some car wash soap and gave baby a bath. After only a month it has out­grown the kitchen sink so I had to do it in the dri­ve­way. Sev­eral neigh­bors stopped by to say, “Oooh, nice car. Is it new?”

Noticed a bitsy paint chip miss­ing off the hood, so small you’d hardly notice it, but it is the first scar it’s got­ten while in my pos­ses­sion. I also noticed that the out­side rearview mir­rors look like they have water spots all over them. At first I thought it was because I didn’t dry them off after the wash, but Windex nor 409 removed them. Hmmm. Acid rain spots? I won­der if the mir­ror is actu­ally plas­tic? The car fin­ish doesn’t have any­thing like that on it.

Pulp Reading

We went out today and burned up the gift cards received for Xmas (and some of our own ready cash as well.) Started at 6:30 AM with break­fast at Best Bagels and then we hit the After Christ­mas sales. First up was Lowes to see about a pre­lighted Christ­mas tree, no go. All they had left were 12′ trees and we don’t have a ceil­ing that high. We shopped Aiken and then we headed over to the big town of Augusta. We were not suc­cess­ful on the tree front, struck out on Christ­mas salt & pep­per shak­ers, but did man­age to get next year’s cards and some var­i­ous sundry items at half price.

Didn’t seem like there was that many peo­ple out or stores open or mer­chan­dise left over this year as there has been the last few years.

I did snag some hard­cover books at Bor­ders. They had a “Buy 2 Bar­gain Books and Get a 3rd Free” thing hap­pen­ing and I’m a wait until they are as cheap as paper­backs kinda a guy.

Already halfway through “Widow’s Walk” by Robert B. Parker. Prob­a­bly fin­ish it tonight, the Spenser books are such easy reads. Like eat­ing a whole bag of potato chips, slick, salty, not really good for you, but def­i­nitely a pleasure.

Thanks Brian, A Well Turned Dictum*

Please accept — with no oblig­a­tion, implied or implicit — my best wishes for an envi­ron­men­tally con­scious, socially respon­si­ble, low stress, non-addictive, gen­der neu­tral cel­e­bra­tion of the win­ter sol­stice hol­i­day, prac­ticed within the most enjoy­able tra­di­tion of the reli­gious per­sua­sion of your choice, or sec­u­lar prac­tices of your pref­er­ence. In addi­tion, please enjoy a fis­cally suc­cess­ful, per­son­ally ful­fill­ing and med­ically uncom­pli­cated recog­ni­tion of the onset of the gen­er­ally accepted cal­en­dar year 2004.

*Stolen directly from Brian Dam­age

‘Twas the Night Before Christmas">Twas the Night Before Christmas

or Account of a Visit from St. Nicholas
by Major Henry Liv­ingston Jr. (1748–1828)
(pre­vi­ously believed to be by Clement Clarke Moore)

Twas the night before Christ­mas, when all through the house
Not a crea­ture was stir­ring, not even a mouse;
The stock­ings were hung by the chim­ney with care,
In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;

The chil­dren were nes­tled all snug in their beds,
While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads;
And mamma in her ‘ker­chief, and I in my cap,
Had just set­tled down for a long winter’s nap,

When out on the lawn there arose such a clat­ter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the mat­ter.
Away to the win­dow I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shut­ters and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the lus­tre of mid-day to objects below,
When, what to my won­der­ing eyes should appear,
But a minia­ture sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer,

With a lit­tle old dri­ver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.
More rapid than eagles his cours­ers they came,
And he whis­tled, and shouted, and called them by name;

Now, DASHER! now, DANCER! now, PRANCER and VIXEN!
On, COMET! on CUPID! on, DONDER and BLITZEN!
To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!”

As dry leaves that before the wild hur­ri­cane fly,
When they meet with an obsta­cle, mount to the sky,
So up to the house-top the cours­ers they flew,
With the sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas too.

And then, in a twin­kling, I heard on the roof
The pranc­ing and paw­ing of each lit­tle hoof.
As I drew in my hand, and was turn­ing around,
Down the chim­ney St. Nicholas came with a bound.

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tar­nished with ashes and soot;
A bun­dle of toys he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a ped­dler just open­ing his pack.

His eyes — how they twin­kled! his dim­ples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
His droll lit­tle mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow;

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke it encir­cled his head like a wreath;
He had a broad face and a lit­tle round belly,
That shook, when he laughed like a bowl­ful of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know I had noth­ing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And filled all the stock­ings; then turned with a jerk,
And lay­ing his fin­ger aside of his nose,
And giv­ing a nod, up the chim­ney he rose;

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whis­tle,
And away they all flew like the down of a this­tle.
But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,
“HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, AND TO ALL A GOOD-NIGHT!”