Sturgeon’s Law

Ninety per­cent of every­thing is crap.


Derived from a quote by sci­ence fic­tion author Theodore Stur­geon, who once said, “Sure, 90% of sci­ence fic­tion is crud. That’s because 90% of every­thing is crud.” Oddly, when Sturgeon’s Law is cited, the final word is almost invari­ably changed to ‘crap’.

Random Images

Smyrna - 29743 Snowman Bethune - 29009 Group Photo

Miles Per Gallon

Fuelly Fuelly

Even On The Net The Commercials Are Loud

Just got through watch­ing the first seg­ment of last night’s New Ams­ter­dam and when it went to the Toy­ota Corolla com­mer­cial the deci­bel level jumped 4 fold.

So far my toy­ing with Word­Press 2.5 has not been very pos­i­tive. The My Net­flix plu­gin doesn’t work (no big deal.) When I did have it work­ing, the new image upload­ing thingie didn’t place the alt or title tag in the link­ing image, so it didn’t have a title on the Lightbox2 pop up (I think I can hack that.) Now, tonight for some rea­son, I can’t upload an image at all, it uploads and then stops with this: An error occurred in the upload. Please try again later. (Deal breaker.) Then, once the upload fails, I can­not nav­i­gate away from the post page with­out get­ting a 412 Pre­con­di­tion Failed error. I will have to test this out as it may be just a plu­gin con­flict. This blog remains the same for now as I’m test­ing the upgrade using the thumbdrive.

Toi­let shop­ping is harder than you might imag­ine (at least for us.)

Started up, went down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 96

System Overload

Some­time last evening my web host pulled the plug on me. Appar­ently I was over­load­ing the CPU on my shared server.

To try and pre­vent this from hap­pen­ing again I have installed a plug-in called WP Cache. What it does is hold pages from the site in a direc­tory and serves them up from there instead of dynam­i­cally cre­at­ing it every time some one shows up. The only real down­side to this is that if you make a com­ment it might not show up on the site for 30 minutes.

Started down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 96

You Want Me To Go In That?

We are strug­gling to find the per­fect new toi­let for our small bath­room. Our major require­ment is that the toi­let not stick too far out from the wall. Our cur­rent one is only 26″ and most every­thing out there is 29–30. A short one-piece unit like we cur­rently have would be nice and a com­fort height toi­let would be a def­i­nite plus as well. You would be sur­prised how hard it is to find a com­bi­na­tion of all three.

I found what I thought was the per­fect solu­tion: the Kohler Purist Hat­box. Until I saw the price — $3198.80. Yikes! That’s for white, if you want it in black it is $1500 more.

I though I would show it to my wife and try and get a reac­tion when I sprung the price on her. Donna took one look at the pic­ture and said, “Its ugly!” The price reveal had just lost all it’s punch.

Started down, went up, still up.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 97

Help Us Rhonda, Help Help Us Rhonda*

* I bet she has never heard that before. :)

This morn­ing we headed over to the plumb­ing show­room we vis­ited on Mon­day after­noon with all inten­tions of buy­ing the final pieces for our remodel job. The woman who spoke to us then, greeted us warmly and asked if we were her 10 o’clock appoint­ment. Ahhh, no. We spoke to her a bit before her 10 o’clock arrived. As we started to leave she asked if we would like to make an appoint­ment, “How’s Mon­day sound?” Not good we replied, how about today? She said she was all booked up, but could squeeze us in between 12 & 12:30. Donna said, “We’ll see you then.” Gee it would have been nice if this wasn’t the first time we heard the word appoint­ment from her…

We left the park­ing lot and turned right, drove 20 yards and turned left into Aiken’s other plumb­ing show­room store. The first time we vis­ited here a cou­ple weeks ago we didn’t get much help because the woman who nor­mally “manned” the show­room was out sick. Rhonda was back, fully recov­ered from the flu, and hov­ered respect­fully as Donna and I and our lit­tle tape mea­sure wan­dered the floor ever hope­ful in our quest for a small short one piece toi­let. Noth­ing fit (pun intended) the bill. There was one toi­let that intrigued us though, it was tall, but very nar­row and as a bonus it was a com­fort height model. Of course, it didn’t match our exist­ing sink which we were plan­ning on keep­ing, but what a coin­ci­dence, right next to the toi­let was the match­ing pedestal sink. Rhonda told us it was real rea­son­able, like maybe $200. Donna shrugged and said, “Let’s get it. What’s an extra cou­ple hun­dred buck.” I’m think­ing to myself all of the pos­si­ble Miata acces­sories I could get with two hun­dred dol­lars, but say out loud with enthu­si­asm (and wis­dom), “OK!” We then quickly agreed on the sec­ond toi­let and a tub, pretty much sight unseen.

The two pieces for the small bath­room are from Mansfield’s Waverly Col­lec­tion. You can see them in this pic­ture stolen from the company’s web site. So caught up in the whole con­sum­ing thing we didn’t think to check how big the sink was. The Waverly toi­let is a lot nar­rower than our cur­rent piece, but the sink is 4–1/2″ wider than the one we have now. We are now going to end up with about an inch and a half between toi­let and sink. Mov­ing the toi­let rough in would be cost pro­hib­i­tive, but depend­ing on stud loca­tion maybe we can get the sink moved over a cou­ple, three inches.

Rhonda will be call­ing me at work on Mon­day to give me pric­ing and avail­abil­ity. Hope­fully we can get the first toi­let and sink in a hurry because the con­trac­tor will be start­ing work on Monday.

Started up, went down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 98

Saturday Snippets

We were sup­posed to go to the Food Lion Auto Fair in Char­lotte today with the MMC but the near guar­an­tee of rainy weather made us stay home.

We went out to lunch at Fire­house Subs to use the coupon for a free sand­wich we got in the mail yesterday.

Stopped at Lowes and spent another C-note on towel bars, toi­let paper hold­ers and such for the bath­room remodels.

The busi­ness card from Rhonda our “Show­room Con­sul­tant” has a nice pic­ture on the left quar­ter panel of the exact faucets that Donna and I have picked out for the bath­rooms (even though where she works doesn’t sell that brand…)

I did a nearly unevent­ful upgrade to Word­Press 2.5.

UCLA got their butts whooped by Mem­phis crush­ing all hopes of me fin­ish­ing in the money on the B-Ball Pool.

We watched the movie Pre­mo­ni­tion this after­noon. It took about halfway through the movie before I fig­ured out what was going on and then with 10 min­utes to go I knew how it was going to end.

Started down, went up, still up.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 99

What Next?

The Home Shop­ping Net­work is going to start show­ing movies? First MTV, AKA Music Tele­vi­sion, stopped play­ing music. Then CNN Head­line News started doing stuff besides con­tin­ual 1/2 hour news shows. The Weather Chan­nel has stopped doing the weather 24/7. And now, tonight, the Car­toon Net­work is show­ing Juras­sic Park 3. That’s not a car­toon. Although I guess some argu­ment could be made that the CGI dinosaurs are and Bill Macy has a face that only a car­toon­ist could love…

We went for a nice walk in Hitch­cock Woods this morn­ing. It has only been a lit­tle over a week since our last visit and the woods have been trans­formed, all the dog­woods and the wild aza­leas are flow­er­ing, plus all the other trees are bud­ding and turn­ing green. I took a cou­ple dozen pho­tos on our walk and I learned two things: 1) I suck at pho­tograph­ing flow­ers and 2) the add an image thing isn’t work­ing in WP 2.5. Fixed.

Totally for­got about the FRS play­ing on TV this after­noon. Stum­bled on the game in the top of the ninth inning and watched them go down in a ball of flames to the Jays for the 3rd straight day. Plus it just seemed so wrong to hear voices I asso­ciate with Braves base­ball on a chan­nel that used to do every Braves base­ball game call­ing an Amer­i­can League game. Their record now stands at 3 wins and 4 loses, not a great start. At least the MFY are only 3 & 3 and we can blame the rocky start on the whole 3 coun­try, 12 time zone road trip. Tues­day is the home opener where the play­ers will get their World Series rings and the 0–5 Tigers are in town. Time to wake up and start look­ing like you want to repeat as WS Champs.

Started up, went down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 100

The Golden Screw

Once upon a time, a young lad was born with­out a belly but­ton. In its place was a golden screw. All the doc­tors told his mother that there was noth­ing they could do. Like it or not, he was stuck with it.

All the years of grow­ing up was real tough on him, as all who saw the screw made fun of him. He avoided ever leav­ing his house and thus, never made any friends. One day, a mys­te­ri­ous stranger saw his belly and told him of a swami in Tibet that could get rid of the screw for him. He was thrilled.

The next day he took all of his life’s sav­ings and bought a ticket to Nepal. After sev­eral days of climb­ing up steep cliffs, he came upon a giant monastery. The swami knew exactly why he had come.

He was told to sleep in the high­est tower of the monastery and the fol­low­ing day when he awoke, the screw would have been removed. The man imme­di­ately went to the room and fell asleep.

Dur­ing the night while he slept, a pur­ple fog floated in an open win­dow, bear­ing in its mist, a golden screw­driver. In just moments, the screw-driver removed the screw and dis­ap­peared out the window.

The next morn­ing when the man woke, he saw the golden screw lay­ing on the pil­low next to him. Reach­ing down, he felt his navel, and there was no screw there! Jubi­lant, he leaped out of bed, and his butt fell off.

The moral to this is, “Don’t screw around with things you don’t under­stand — you could lose your ass.”

Crude Composite II

The small bath­room has been gut­ted. The gen­e­sis for this project was the fact that the pan under the tile shower was leak­ing. Turns out there was good rea­son for that, there was no pan. Appar­ently 55 years ago they just slapped a very (and I mean very) thick layer of “mud” and laid tile on top of it. As a mat­ter of fact the whole bath­room floor was unortho­dox. Instead of just ply­wood over joists there is a kind of lathe over the ply­wood sub-floor that was then cov­ered with an inch and a half of the same mud, then the tile on top of that.

The file upload­ing that I thought I had fixed yes­ter­day is still giv­ing me prob­lems today. I found another workaround, but for some rea­son I didn’t need it tonight because after a cou­ple of failed attempts to upload the pic­ture, some­how it was there and usable. I guess I should have read the forums before upgrad­ing, but it seems that before releas­ing 2.5 into the wild some­one would have noticed that the media uploader wasn’t work­ing right.

I also found a hack to take the place of the plu­gin I was using to keep the Joke cat­e­gory entries from show­ing up on the front page. I added a cute one today — The Golden Screw. In spite of the title, it is actu­ally PG rated…

I for­got one item that should have been included in the Sat­ur­day Snip­pets post — A Fool And His Money Are Soon Parted.

Started down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 100

Good Day

It was def­i­nitely a good day to be a Red Sox fan. The play­ers got their World Series rings today in a 45 minute cer­e­mony prior to the home opener. Bil Buck­ner, that’s right Bill Buck­ner, threw out the first pitch. The FRS won the game 5–0 behind the pitch­ing of the 13 Tril­lion Yen Man. The only thing that didn’t go right is my offi­cial 2008 Red Sox Nation mem­ber­ship card didn’t arrive in the mail.

But Blue Miata and Tia were wait­ing patiently in the mail­box for me today. The red ones are at work and I think these smurf blue ver­sions will stay home. There are also gold ver­sions out there too, but I think I’m going to pass on acquir­ing them. I think is time to buy some Lost “action” fig­ures instead.

Hard to tell from this photo, but a lot was done on the bath­room project today. The floor was repaired, a real shower liner of vinyl was put in place, and most of the new moved wall was put up. The con­trac­tor picked up the tile today. We will meet with him after work tomor­row to dis­cuss how we want it put in.

Started down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 100

Do I Know You?

We bought some dou­ble towel bars for the “big” bath­room the other day at Lowes. Trou­ble is we weren’t I wasn’t think­ing. The towel bars are mounted behind the door, so because the dou­ble bar sticks out from the wall so far it wouldn’t allow the door to fully open. Tonight we went back to swap them out for a cou­ple of sin­gle towel bars.

When we walked up to the returns desk the woman looked at me and asked, “Are you Brian?” She didn’t look famil­iar. I looked down to see if I was wear­ing my MMC Jacket which has my name embroi­dered on the front, I wasn’t. My name isn’t on the receipt any­where… How did she know my name?

Donna was wear­ing one of these Ash Grey T-Shirts.

Started down, went up, back down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 102

No New Pictures

I didn’t take any new pho­tos of the bath­room today. Not that there wasn’t any progress, there was, but it was elec­tri­cal, some inter­nal plumb­ing and ceil­ing work. What seemed a sim­ple request turned into a bit of extra work. We asked to have a foot added to the bath­room, steal­ing from the adjoin­ing bed­room. When the con­trac­tor tore down that bit of wall, it turned out that there was a notice­able height dif­fer­ence between rooms, so he had to add a piece on sheet rock on the bath­room ceil­ing to even things out.

Yes­ter­day the tile place called to tell me that I didn’t get all my tile. I guess I should have counted it, but the promised invoice never got mailed, so I didn’t know what I *should* have any­way (I got it today.) Four pieces of the 1′ square 3 x 3 floor tile was back ordered and it had just come in, but they were afraid it wasn’t the right color. Not only that, they said I should check what I had already picked up, to make sure it matched my 13 x 13 floor tiles. Last night I checked and the col­ors were the same. This morn­ing the con­trac­tor did some quick fig­ur­ing and I already have enough to do the job, I don’t need those other 4 pieces, so color match­ing them is not an issue. I think that when we were fig­ur­ing the job, we ordered enough of the 3 x 3 to inset two rows as accents, and now look­ing at the space, one is pretty much what we want. As long as the square of 3 x 3 is still intact I can get my money back.

Good thing too, as the money back from those tiles will be enough, if not a lit­tle more, to cover order­ing more bull­nose tiles we still need. Seems like when we were fig­ur­ing how much was required for the job we for­got about the whole ver­ti­cal edge thing, we ordered only enough to run all along the top of the tile in both bath­rooms. I ordered that today and it won’t be here until next week some­time, but that is not a prob­lem because what we have on hand is enough to fin­ish the cur­rent bath.

The big worry now is, where the heck is the pedestal sink and the toi­lets? The promised two to three days deliv­ery from order­ing them is now. Maybe they will be here tomorrow.

Started down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 102

Hulu

Vis­i­ble progress today.The shower walls got tiled and a lit­tle of floor too. Plus there was more patch­ing and fill­ing of walls.

I may or may not have heard about Hulu when it was first announced, but after “dis­cov­er­ing” it a cou­ple days ago I have been wast­ing quite a bit of time there. While the video is not broad­cast TV qual­ity it ain’t half bad. There are both movies and TV view­able. The movies are few and hit or miss, but there is a lot of TV, from McHale’s Navy to Bones. There are a cou­ple of nit­pick though, not all the seasons/episodes are avail­able and not all the TV is com­mer­cial free. At least the ads are few, short and some­what unob­tru­sive (so far.)

Tonight I watched Seren­ity, the 1–1/2 hour pilot for the sci-fi one sea­son won­der from FOX, Fire­fly. A cou­ple of months ago I rented disc one of the series from Net­flix and turned it off about 10 min­utes in. I guess I was a bit pre­ma­ture, as it turned out to be right on par with Hulu’s image qual­ity, not half bad. I will prob­a­bly watch a cou­ple more episodes before decid­ing if I want to watch all 14.

Started down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 102

Official Citizen

Sounds kind of Social­ist doesn’t it? (not that there is any­thing wrong with that.) My 2008 Red Sox Nation mem­ber­ship card came in the mail today. Got a sticker too.

I’ve been a mem­ber of the Nation since I was 10 years-old or so, long before the mar­ket­ing depart­ment of Major League Base­ball thought there should be such a thing. I swore the oath at 12 in that incred­i­ble sum­mer of 1967. I really don’t need the card to val­i­date my cit­i­zen­ship, but see­ing as they want $14.95 to join and it costs the same amount as a sub­scrip­tion Game­day Audio (which I usu­ally get and is included in the mem­ber­ship), I sign up.

Because this week­end is a three game series against the MFY I am only lis­ten­ing to one of the games. The other two are on TV, because when the Red Sox play the Yan­kees it is like the Mon­tagues and the Capulets, the Hat­fields and the McCoys, the Sharks & the Jets, high drama makes riv­et­ing television.

But after lis­ten­ing to last night’s game and watch­ing today’s, the rivalry doesn’t seem to have the same inten­sity so far as it has had in the past. Maybe because the FRS are still jet lagged from the Japan trip. Maybe because the Red Sox have finally exor­cised the “curse” with the two cham­pi­onships in 4 years thing. Maybe all the Yan­kees are sad about them tear­ing down the House That Ruth Built. Or maybe it is just me.

Started down, went up, back down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 104

There Was Gold In Them Thar Hills

The Post Offices still seem too far away, but the weather was too nice not to take a drive with the top down. So instead of our usual walk in the close by Hitch­cock Woods we took a drive to Par­sons Moun­tain near Abbeville.

A long time ago, back when Donna and I used to moun­tain bike, we came up here because some­one said they had a really great trail to ride. Turns out it we didn’t think it was great. The trail (which is now closed to every­thing but hik­ers) starts out going up and then after about 3/4 mile starts really going up, not only up, but rough and rocky. I don’t remem­ber it explic­itly, but I’m think­ing we did a lot of push­ing our bikes.

The first part of today’s walk was still up, but we enjoyed a lot more. About 3/4 mile up there are four squares of chain link fence sur­round­ing holes in the moun­tain that used to be a gold mine back in the late 1800’s. Fur­ther up the trail is a fire tower that used to be open to the pub­lic for a spec­tac­u­lar view. But now it is sur­rounded by that same chain link fenc­ing as the gold mines. The fence doesn’t seem to be a major deter­rent to some folks judg­ing by the top of the fence and the graf­fiti on the tower, but it was enough to keep us out.

Started down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 104

We’ve Got Toilets

Not yet exactly, they are at the dealer and will be deliv­ered tomor­row. We are almost ready for them too. The shower walls were grouted today and the floor in the room is about half done. The walls are almost ready for wainscoting.

I have started my LOST action fig­ure col­lec­tion with not just one, but two fig­ures. I scoured ebay look­ing for fig­ures I could buy for no more than $15 bucks total (price & ship­ping.) My main objec­tive was Hugo (Hur­ley) Reyes. My first attempt fell 50¢ short. The next time I found one to bid on, it was after check­ing out a cou­ple other char­ac­ters, and some­how I man­aged to bid on a Shan­non fig­ure. Whiny Shan­non was always my least favorite “main” char­ac­ter on the show and if the acci­den­tal pur­chase had any redeem­ing value it was that I was the only bid­der (guess I’m not the only one who isn’t a Shan­non fan), so she is going to cost me only a penny over the $8 ship­ping fee.

Luck was with me next time, as right after the Shan­non auc­tion closed I found a Hur­ley fig­ure that had a cou­ple days left on it. The next bid up was just a buck over my arbi­trary fif­teen buck limit, so I gave iit a shot, never fig­ur­ing it would hold up. It did.

Started down, went up, still up.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 105

We’ve Got A Floor

Just need to grout the white tiles on the sep­a­ra­tor between the bath­room & the shower area. Next step is to put up the bead board on the walls. Toss in some fix­tures and we are almost there.

Started up, went down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 106

Some Sexual Double Entendres Spam Fun

Actual emails caught in my work­place spam trap.

Half the time twice the erec­tion from seseiopo@HDSMARKETING.COM

Fan­tas­tic growth guar­an­teed from Gabriele-ckmannin@FICAEL.COM.BR

Nurs­ing home abuse! from return@newerpossibilities.com

The biggest mean­est bad daddy from lowie-twuots@CRAIGHOMECARE.COM

Wham Bam Thank You Pam from egarekor@BILLPAXTON.NET

Enlarge­ment for dum­mies from rpnevjiw_1977@VALEXKOREA.COM

Give her the best time from ediool_1963@GLITC.ORG

Hark­ness pri­vate foun­da­tion from Kclpv@adelphia.com

Seduc­tive pro­posal of health­care. from funna_1967@Umica.plus.com

Paris loves it hard from sadnesse_1953@SUPERVIELLE.COM.AR

Unleash your titan from Heiko-fluitert@14WFIE.com

Almost There

Fin­ish the toi­let, hook it and the sink up, hang the mir­ror and the new light fix­ture, then a final skim coat the smooth out the last of the wall and the con­trac­tor will be done. Then it will be up to us to paint and hang a shower cur­tain rod, some towel bars and the TP holder for the final fin­ish­ing touches.

And speak­ing of remod­el­ing, I’m work­ing on a new theme for here. Same sort of color scheme and what not, but it will have 3 (count ‘em, that’s one more than two) columns. Big news is it will be wid­get ready! Not that I have any wid­gets picked out, or for that mat­ter even know what a wid­get is, but I’m going to be a wid­gety fool.

We’ve got to clean up the bed­room with the newly remod­eled bath in it on Fri­day, so we can move in to it, because start­ing Mon­day the other bath gets ham­mered on. We are off on Sat­ur­day for some Post Office hunt­ing and will be back late Sun­day, caus­ing work on the theme project to be light over the week­end. So you may not see the new look for awhile, heck if I keep dawdling, I may end up los­ing inter­est and you’ll never see it.

Started up, went down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 106

TGIT

The only thing left to do here Mr. Con­trac­tor Man is to put in the bot­tom mold­ing around the out­side of where the new wall is. He is hav­ing trou­ble get­ting a match for the shape. Appar­ently they stopped mak­ing that style about 25 years ago. We told him just get close, once it is all painted no one is going to notice. Oh yeah, he has to get an elec­tri­cian in to wire up the exhaust fan.

He will start on the other bath­room on Mon­day. When that one is done I will paint that bath­room before we move back to that side of the house, then I will come back to this bath­room and paint it along with the bed­room. The bead board will get a coat of gloss white, the top mold­ing of the bead board will get a gray to sort of match the tile and the upper wall will get a light blue. The bed­room will get a slightly darker blue with white trim. I haven’t picked out the col­ors for the other larger bath­room yet, I guess I’ll wait until it is done…

Started down, went up, back down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 108

Hurley Is A Citizen Too

Just after lunch today there was a knock at the door. We weren’t expect­ing any­one, but turns out that was wrong. When Donna opened the door there was the unlikely duo of Shan­non Ruther­ford and Hugo Reyes. I knew Jack was a Sox fan, but I was sur­prised to find a native son of Santa Mon­ica, CA was too. I had bid victoriously.

Here’s an item I won’t be vic­to­ri­ous on — I don’t have quite enough cash in my Pay­Pal account — David Ortiz “Yan­kees Curse” Jersey

I primered the the inside of the newly remod­eled bath­room and then hung a towel rack, the TP holder and the shower cur­tain rod. We started to shuf­fle things around in prepa­ra­tion for mov­ing our bed­room to the other end of the house. We cleaned out the two clos­ets by car­ry­ing a dozen boxes up into the attic. Sun­day night we’ll move the bed and our clothes to com­plete the transition.

Broke down and washed the car tonight, even though there is a chance of after­noon thun­der show­ers tomor­row. Pine pollen sea­son is all but over and it has been 6 weeks since the last wash, so I fig­ured it was time. Plus we are going on a Post Office Safari tomor­row and the Emperor always like to put his best face for­ward even though he isn’t the pri­mary pho­to­graphic subject.

Started down, went up, back down, up again, still up.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 111

Pedro Sez 75,000 Crappy Trinkets Available Here

The Emperor passed through the 75,000 mile mark just east of Colum­bia on I-20.

After break­fast this morn­ing we hopped on the inter­state and headed east not get­ting off until some­where north of Flo­rence on I-95. We then spent the rest of the day trav­el­ing the back roads of rural north­east South Car­olina nab­bing pho­tos of Post Offices. We ended up the day with 14 cap­tured. We even had to stop at a library in a city along the way to find a PO we had a map for (we were look­ing north of town instead of south)and one that we didn’t (even though I have an image of it on the thumbdrive.)

The rude employ­ees at a Sub­way in Lake City did us a favor. After we walked out in dis­gust, we ended up at a Mex­i­can place, La Bamba, that was ter­rific. Their Car­ni­tas were scrump­tious and the ice cold Dos Equis was much bet­ter than any foun­tain drink avail­able at the other place.

Tomor­row morn­ing — Cin­na­mon Bun.

Started up, went down, back up, back down, went up, went down, up again, still up.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 117

10 More

Of course we couldn’t come straight home, we did a loop down around Lake Moul­trie, sling­shot­ing us out of the pull of low coun­try grav­ity and pro­pelling us back to Aiken, while grab­bing ten more Post Office pic­tures. The weekend’s tally, 24 Post Offices in 600 miles.

We did miss one town on the north shore of the lake, Pineville (another miss­ing map.) I thought it was because we already had a pic­ture of that PO, but that wasn’t really pos­si­ble because there was no way we could have been there before. We have been to Pineland and Pinewood pre­vi­ously and we did go to Pinop­o­lis today. Where I took this picture:

Started up, went down, back up, back down, up once more, still up.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 121

Rebate Processor Needed — Great Pay

I have been hov­er­ing around at a level of 55 spam emails a day here at work, but over the week­end it spiked. One hun­dred on Sat­ur­day and 150 on Sun­day. They must really need a lot of Rebate Proces­sors because of the 250 spams I received, one hun­dred and forty six were promis­ing great pay to do that job, about one every 16 min­utes over a 41 hour span.

All of them look like their email addresses were ran­domly gen­er­ated in the man­ner of FirstnameLastname@subdomain.domain.com. Neat but not enough to sneak by Postini.

Before & After

Started up, went down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 122

Oil Change

The floor is back in the sec­ond bath­room. The tub is in and the backer board is up around two sides, but the third side will have to wait until some plumb­ing work gets done. The new tub is about 4 inches taller than the old, so the old knobs just barely clear the new tub.

Came home from work and changed the Emperor’s oil. Rotated his tires too. 75,576. Yes­ter­day when I decided to change the oil, I looked under the shelf in the garage where I keep a stash of OEM Mazda oil fil­ters and didn’t see any, so when I bought the oil I picked up a Pure­One fil­ter (some­body was sup­posed to remind me not to.) After chang­ing the oil, as I was putting away my drain pan and fun­nel, I noticed that stacked just to the left were three Mazda fil­ters. Nor­mally I keep the stock of fil­ters inside the oil drain pan, when I checked yes­ter­day, I didn’t see any in the pan, so I fig­ured I needed one. Wrong.

Some­one remind me next time that the fil­ters aren’t in the drain pan (some­body other that the per­son who was sup­posed to remind me not to buy a Pure­One oil filter…)

Started down, went up, back down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 124

That Was Unexpected

Did you ever have a really cool idea for a joke and have it go hor­ri­bly wrong, but still be worth it?

A co-worker (Hi Mark) and his sis­ter are always trad­ing gotchas and he has been after me to take some cheesy steer­ing wheel cover on vaca­tion out west and mail it to her so she won’t have a clue who sent it to her. See­ing as we are redo­ing bath­rooms in lieu of going west this year he cooked up a dif­fer­ent plan that I could help with. And it fit right into Donna and my Post Office pic­ture taking.

Mark bought a deck of cards, a box of envelopes and 3 books of stamps. We would put one play­ing card in an enve­lope and mail it to his sis­ter from each Post Office we vis­ited. I used a laser printer and addressed 55 envelopes to his sis­ter with a return address of John Smith, 123 Main St, Any­town, USA 123456. The first enve­lope con­tained the box so she would have a place to put the cards when they arrived. To ensure she kept the box I printed out a lit­tle note to go in the enve­lope with the help of the Ran­som Note Gen­er­a­tor. Two week­ends ago Donna and I made a trip up to Green­wood, SC to mail the box. We picked Green­wood, the sister’s home­town, so she wouldn’t imme­di­ately sus­pect Mark (even though he knew she would think it was him any­way.) Mark didn’t even tell his wife what we were up to because he knew his sis­ter would call her and get the truth out of her.

Because I didn’t want to just put a play­ing card in an enve­lope, I was going to put a piece of blank paper in with it. Then I thought maybe I’d put one word on the paper and when she had all the pieces of paper there would be a sen­tence that explained the whole gag. But I thought that was a lit­tle too much, so Plan B was to gather 52 quotes from the inter­net and put one on each page. For extra fun I made sure to get a quote that included a bolded word match­ing the card, i.e. “When I have to choose between two evils, I always try to pick the one I haven’t tried before.” – Mae West went in with the two of clubs.

This week­end when we went on our PO photo trip we mailed an enve­lope from nearly every Post Office on Sat­ur­day and a cou­ple more on Sun­day. Because the Post Offices were all closed when we got to them we mailed them inside when we could, but most ended up in the blue box out­side. Because the blue boxes don’t get emp­tied until late in the day, almost all our “let­ters” didn’t make it into the sys­tem until Mon­day night.

Yes­ter­day Mark’s sis­ter got 11 pieces of mail that included a play­ing card and a quote. Now here is where it went off course, instead of think­ing it was her brother hav­ing a lit­tle fun, she thought some­one was harass­ing her and went to the local police. That’s right—the police.

This morn­ing Mark’s sis­ter called Mark’s wife to tell her about the ordeal she was going through. Now because Mark’s wife knows noth­ing of the prank she can only lis­ten with con­cern about the prob­lem. Nat­u­rally when they get off the phone with each other, Mark’s wife calls him. She tells him about his sis­ter going to the police with these harass­ing let­ters and how the offi­cer has told her it looks like the work of a sex­ual preda­tor and if she gets any­more (which she will tomor­row) to bring them right in and they’ll try and get some fin­ger­prints off them. At this point Mark real­izes the jig is up and con­fesses to his wife that he was behind the letters.

Mark then came up front to tell Donna and I the story where we all had a great big laugh about it. Then, because both Donna and my fin­ger­prints are on file from being in the mil­i­tary, and not being real sure how seri­ous the detec­tive was tak­ing the case and not want­ing to really worry his sis­ter Mark emailed the quote file to her and then called to tell her to check her email while he was on the phone with her. She was some­what relieved at not being stalked, but some­what mad. We are hop­ing in a cou­ple weeks she will see the humor in the whole thing.

Started down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 124

Floors & Wall

There wasn’t much vis­i­ble progress made yes­ter­day, a lot of new plumb­ing, but today we got the dry­wall up and the tile around the tub. Tomor­row there will prob­a­bly be tile on the floor.

Finally watched “The Com­mit­ments” tonight. Just as good as the first time, although Donna thought she was watch­ing it for the first time…

I’m typ­ing away dur­ing the com­mer­cials because Lost is on. In tonight’s episode the writ­ers have decided to lighten the pay­roll con­sid­er­able. A man has washed ashore with his neck slit, three Red Shirts were gunned down, Sayid’s wife is dead and Ben’s “daugh­ter” was exe­cuted in front of him.

No, you weren’t imag­in­ing things, there was a video here, but it seemed to pre­vent the page from load­ing under cer­tain con­di­tions, so I yanked it.

Started down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 124

Not Much To Say

The tile is down, but needs grout­ing. The bead board is up, leav­ing the top to be mod­i­fied for a med­i­cine cab­i­net and the new light fix­ture. The contractor’s usual elec­tri­cian has been to busy to get over here and wire up the exhaust fans, so he is call­ing in a favor from another fel­low and they will be here tomor­row to wire things up. They won’t be inter­rupt­ing us in any way because we will be out run­ning the MMC’s annual Time, Speed, & Dis­tance Rally.

I’ve given up on the whole new theme, who needs wid­gets any­way, but I’m going to change the color scheme. I’m going to keep the diag­o­nal stripe back­ground and I had down­loaded the per­fect one from the Stripe Gen­er­a­tor, but acci­den­tally over­wrote it when sav­ing the new header and I can’t get it back (I hope just for now) because the stripe page is down.

Still try­ing to digest last night’s episode of TDTVS, even after a sec­ond view­ing tonight. We got a half answer to a big ques­tion, but sev­eral more new ones were asked.And what was up with the bad guys, were they actu­ally try­ing to miss Say­wer on pur­pose with their fusil­lade or was that a text­book exam­ple of the Auto­matic Miss Syn­drome?

Started down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 124

Reggy

Reggy, the Mas­cot Hall of Fame Mascot.

We went to a rain storm tonight with my sis­ter and her hus­band and a Greenville Drive base­ball game broke out. The game was sup­posed to start at 7:00, but because of storms in the area it was moved to 8 o’clock. Then 8:30. The game finally got under­way at 9:03. If they weren’t afraid of a lit­tle light­ning and just started the game on time it would have been almost over by the time they started it. As it was we left at a lit­tle before 11:00 and the game was just in the bot­tom of the 6th inning.

I’ll try and blog about the Miata Club rally tomor­row It is get­ting late and if I try and write about it now it will be tomor­row when I fin­ish. Let’s just say we fin­ished 3rd (out of four cars.)

Started down, went up, back down, up again, still up.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 127

The Miata *IS* As Good As A Pickup Truck

Need a love seat moved, no prob­lem.

How Not To Rally

We read and under­stood the instruc­tions, at least we thought we did. Take a look at the scan of the instruc­tions (click to zoom), I think you can read them pretty good.

All but the first few instruc­tions con­sist of a pic­ture, a direc­tion (right or left) and a num­ber. The num­ber rep­re­sents the oppor­tu­nity after the pic­ture at which you should turn in the direc­tion spec­i­fied. … Pic­tured objects may be on either side of the road. Oppor­tu­ni­ties: Paved streets and roads on the same side as your next turn are oppor­tu­ni­ties. Dead-end or “no out­let” streets or roads, if paved are oppor­tu­ni­ties. Dri­ve­ways, entrances to park­ing lots, and unpaved streets or roads are not oppor­tu­ni­ties. Oppor­tu­ni­ties are reset by a num­bered instruction.

What we both knew would be trou­ble was the way the pho­tos were to be fol­lowed. On the front there were two rows of three, the back con­sisted of 3 rows of 3 columns and you were sup­posed to read them the way they are num­bered, in columns.

For a change of pace this time, Donna drove and I acted as nav­i­ga­tor, she wanted me to expe­ri­ence the pres­sure of respon­si­bil­ity instead of just whistling while I drove. We left the start point first brim­ming with confidence.

We spot­ted our first pic­ture with ease after exit­ing the inter­state and then the trou­ble began. I started count­ing oppor­tu­ni­ties when the dri­ver ques­tioned my count­ing method, ie. she wanted to know why we weren’t count­ing on both sides of the street. While I explained my inter­pre­ta­tion of the rules to her she kept dri­ving. Dur­ing this brief inter­lude I could not main­tain 100% vig­i­lance on oppor­tu­nity count­ing. Uh-oh, 4 miles into the event and we were already in a cloud of uncertainty.

We arrived at a major inter­sec­tion which seemed to be a nat­ural spot for our turn, but I was only at 6 and we needed to take the 7th turn. We turned any­way. After dri­ving about 5 miles we started to worry, we had not yet spot­ted the next clue, a water tower. Was that oppor­tu­nity 6 we turned at instead of the cor­rect #7? We agreed to go to the top of the next rise and if there was no tower we would turn around. Well there was no tower so Donna did a u-turn. Half way back to the scene of our sup­posed mis­take we passed car #2 going in the oppo­site direc­tion (the one we used to be trav­el­ing in.) We have fin­ished 2nd or 3rd to the cou­ple in this car the last 2 years. The uncer­tainty clouds just thick­ened a bit.

Press­ing on, hop­ing that they mis­counted too, when we got to the spot where we turned, we took a left and started look­ing for what might be the 7th left oppor­tu­nity. We passed a lot of dirt roads, a few dri­ve­ways and we also passed going in the oppo­site direc­tion from us, car #3. They obvi­ously thought this was a wrong course of action. We kept on and when we found what we thought would be the “cor­rect” left turn, it was a dead-end. While dead-ends are oppor­tu­ni­ties, dri­ving down one at this point would not be a good idea. Time to turn around again.

Sure enough, the other turn was the cor­rect one, not a mile past were we had turned around, was the water tower. As we passed oppor­tu­nity #3 and on our way to tak­ing the next right, we came up behind car #4. They turned and we turned right behind them. I told Donna to go around them so we could make up the time we had lost in our ill-fatted attempt at the start. She gunned it and zipped on by. We were back in the hunt.

But not for long, I then did exactly what we thought I would, instead of going to the top of the third col­umn, I reverted to my early child­hood train­ing and read from left to right, skip­ping right to clue num­ber 8, bypass­ing clue 7 entirely. Even though we didn’t take a left because of the missed clue we ended up on course some­how, but we started count­ing oppor­tu­ni­ties too soon. Wen we got to where the next clue should have been, we found the rail­road tracks, but the road in the back­ground looked dif­fer­ent than what was in the photo. Fig­ur­ing it was just par­al­lax error we turned right as if every­thing was hunky-dory. Sure enough the next clue, #10, was on the road we were on.

We found num­ber 11, 12 and 13 before not see­ing #14 at all. Fig­ur­ing we missed it and com­ing to a tee inter­sec­tion, we took a right because that was what we were sup­posed to do at the first oppor­tu­nity after the miss­ing clue. Hot-diggity, clue #15 was right where it should have been which led us to num­ber six­teen and then #17 and the end of the rally.

In spite of the “detour” we were the first car to fin­ish and because of a clue at the end of the instruc­tions, we thought we were early. Know­ing this and that we missed some clues pos­si­bly short­cut­ting the route I took our time and dis­tance fig­ured and padded them using a SWAG (sci­en­tific wild ass guess) and handed in our sheet. In the end, even if I handed in our true fig­ures, we would have still ended up in third, but only because car #3 arrived a full two and a half hours after we did, hav­ing made four attempts at run­ning the rally until they were suc­cess­ful just so they wouldn’t have to open the emer­gency envelope.

Wait’ll next year.

Started up, went down, back up, back down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 130

She’s Not Using That Either?

The wife came home early and found her hus­band in their bed­room mak­ing love to a very attrac­tive young woman.

You dis­re­spect­ful pig!” she cried. “How dare you do this to me…a faith­ful wife, the mother of your chil­dren! I’m leav­ing you.. I want a divorce!”

He replied, “Hang on just a minute, so at least I can tell you what happened.”

Fine, go ahead”, she sobbed , “but they’ll be the last words you’ll say to me!”

So he began — “Well, I was get­ting into the car to drive home and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defense­less that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn’t eaten for three days! So, in my com­pas­sion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchi­ladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn’t eat because you’re afraid you’ll put on weight.

The poor thing devoured them in moments. Since she needed a good clean-up I sug­gested a shower, and while she was doing that I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I threw them away.

Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don’t use because you say they are too tight.. I also gave her the under­wear that was your anniver­sary present, which you don’t use because I don’t have good taste.

I found the sexy blouse my sis­ter gave you for Christ­mas that you don’t use just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expen­sive bou­tique and don’t use because some­one at work has the same pair.”

He took a quick breath and con­tin­ued — “She was so grate­ful for my under­stand­ing and help and as I walked her to the door she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said,

Please … Do you have any­thing else that your wife doesn’t use?”

Nearing The Finish

Almost fin­ished. The con­trac­tor has a cou­ple spots to touch up and the mir­ror to hang and he is done in the sec­ond bath. Now it is up to me to fin­ish up with paint­ing, etc. We think we are going to go with a green in here on a sim­i­lar note to the blue in the other bath­room. The exist­ing bor­der is com­ing down and the bright green on the win­dow frame will be painted over in white.

Donna and I are off this week­end to the GA moun­tains. We are shar­ing a cabin with two other cou­ples we know from the Miata Club. If we are back in the cabin on Sat­ur­day evening early enough we are going to watch a movie. Even though I think it will be nearly impos­si­ble to pick a movie that every­one will like, I vol­un­teered to try. I asked every­one to send me a list of two movies that were either their favorite movie or some­thing that if they stum­bled on it on TV they would watch it the rest of the way no mat­ter what they were watch­ing or doing before. So far all three ladies have com­plied. One guy (me) has offered up his two picks, one only gave me one movie title and num­ber three has been not sub­mit­ted any­thing yet. Here is the list so far (in no par­tic­u­lar order):

  1. My Cousin Vinny
  2. Dirty Danc­ing
  3. The Fugi­tive
  4. Something’s Gotta Give
  5. Titanic
  6. Ocean’s 11, 12 or 13
  7. Pirates of the Caribbean
  8. Pretty Woman
  9. Bul­lit

I have asked a cou­ple folks at work for sug­ges­tions of movies that have some action, some com­edy, a bunch of romance with a car or boat chase. Here are the their and my sug­ges­tions (once again in no par­tic­u­lar order):

  1. For Love of the Game
  2. Bon­nie & Clyde
  3. Milk Money
  4. Out of Sight

Any other ideas?

I searched the inter­net for movie rec­om­men­da­tion sites, but they all required rat­ing a ton of movies before spit­ting out per­sonal rec­om­men­da­tions. What I really need is some­thing along the lines of Pan­dora radio for movies. Maybe I should open a new Net­flix account and just rate these 9 movies and see what it recommends…

Started down, went up, back down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 132

New Truck

One day Jim Bob was walk­ing down Main Street when he saw his buddy Bubba dri­ving a brand new pickup. Bubba pulled up to him with a wide grin.

Bubba, where’d you git that truck?!?”

Tam­mie Joe gived it to me,” Bubba replied.

She gived it to ya? I know’d she wuz kinda sweet on ya’ll but a new truck?”

Well, Jim Bob let me tell you wut’ hap­pened. We wuz dri­vin’ out on County Road 6, in the mid­dle of nowheres. Tam­mie Joe pulled off the road, put the truck in 4X4 wheel drive, and headed into the woods. She parked the truck, got out, threw off all her clothes and said, ‘Bubba, ya’ll take what­ever you want.’”

So I took the truck!”

Bubba, yore a smart man! Them clothes woulda never fit you!”

76,000 Nitpicks

The con­trac­tor is done. Well, all except for he’ll be back next week some­time to install the bot­tom mold­ing around on the out­side of the new walls of the small bath­room. He left behind a few lit­tle things that need to be taken care of, might be eas­ier for me to go ahead and take care of them, but I might just leave them for his return. There is one part of the bath­room wall that didn’t get totally smoothed out, prob­a­bly missed it because it is hid­den by the usu­ally open door. The light fix­ture above the mir­ror was wob­bly and I asked him to tighten it down, but it didn’t get done ( I fixed it tonight.) There is a crack in the grout in the cor­ner seam of the stand up shower, that he touched up today with just some success.

The one that is most notice­able was not within his con­trol. We bought Price Pfis­ter porce­lain cross han­dled faucets for both show­ers and one for the bath­room sink in the big bath­room for two rea­sons, 1) we like the look and 2) they would match our already exist­ing faucet in the small bath­room. The exist­ing one works in a man­ner such that you turn both knobs counter-clockwise for on and clock­wise for off. We were thrown for a loop when we started to use the new shower in the small bath­room. This set works by turn­ing the cold counter-clockwise for on and the hot clock­wise for on. Now in the newly com­pleted big bath­room at least the shower/unit con­trols are iden­ti­cal to the ones in the shower of the other bath­room, but incred­i­bly the van­ity faucets are just the oppo­site of the shower units, you turn the cold clock­wise for on and the hot counter-clockwise. So now we have to learn how to oper­ate 4 sep­a­rate faucets in three dif­fer­ent man­ners. I hope I don’t scold some­thing important.

Today on the way home from work the Emperor reached the 122,310km (76,000 mile) plateau.

Started down, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 132

3/4 The Same

I swapped the inserts on the van­ity faucet and now three fourths of the bath­room faucets work the same — in is on and out is off.

The instruc­tions for installing these units actu­ally spec­ify that they work the way they did yes­ter­day, so Mr. Con­trac­tor had installed them right. What about the shower/tub faucets? Were they installed right? Who knows, I didn’t save those instruc­tions, but I’m bet­ting they were installed just the way the Price Pfis­ter wanted them. So why would they turn the oppo­site way from sinks? I guess we’ll never know.

Started down, went up, still down.
Miata Top Tran­si­tions since 01/01/08: 134