Fantasy Football

Good News/Bad News

Good
Somehow, through no fault of my own, the Angry Ladybugs have slipped into the EZEFFL Playoffs. I won the last game of the season by beating the only team in the conference with a worse record than me1 and was helped out by having the only combination of two teams, who I held the tie-breaker over, losing.

Bad
Another “I Really Am Old” milestone was passed today when I signed up for a Wheel of Fortune Spin ID number. Most nights at 7:00 PM we’ve finished eating and are parked comfortably on the couch, so after watching the network news, watching Pat & Vanna are the perfect mental pallet cleanser and blood pressure lowering tool. If you happen to be tuned in and see the Spin Id Number of BB6861302, let me know, I’ll split it with you.

What’s In A Name?

On Monday when I changed my fantasy football team name from Purple Whale to Angry Ladybugs another team owner in the league, our IT Guy, changed the name of his team to Purple Whales. When I asked him about it on Tuesday, he said it was just a joke and that he would change it back.

He said he really did it so he could ask, “How come Angry Ladybugs?” I explained the original of the Purple Whale name to him (read it here) and how on Monday my cubicle neighbor prompted the name change (read it in the previous post) from whales to ladybugs.

By Thursday my co-worker, and former friend, hadn’t changed it back, so I decided to maybe I’d change the Angry Ladybugs back to Purple Whales (as far as I know ESPN doesn’t care if you have 2 teams of the same name in the same league.) But then I thought I would follow POTUS’s twitter handle example and call myself the @Real Purple Whales. Made a logo and everything.

So, this morning I asked the team name usurper why he still hadn’t changed back to his original name, Dark Helmet. He said, “Well I was going to until I saw what you did, so I’m going to rename my team The Original Purple Whales as soon as I find a suitable image to use for it.”

When I got to my desk, cubical neighbor David, who prompted the Angry Ladybugs name swap to begin with, wondered why I had already changed away from it. I gave him the run down and he decided that he would join the fun too by changing his team name to Dark Helmet to poke at the IT Guy.

Well, IT Guy went to change his name back mid-morning and discovered that someone was using it, he shrugged and renamed the team back, but used all caps – so he’s DARK HELMET again. This got my cubical neighbor to change his team name from Dark Helmet to Swamp Cat, which thank heaven, is unique to our league. This is also an improvement from his former league default name, the word team, followed by the owner’s last name. Which come to think of it, a pretty neat name for a team would be to use the actual words last & name – Team Last Name.

I guess I’ll go change my name back to Angry Ladybugs. And for the record, I don’t think my changing the team name had any effect on its performance. My “star” running back got only 4.1 of ESPN”s predicted 13 points last night. Now I’m in danger of losing this week to an opponent who has two guys on bye in his active line up and will more than likely end up fielding only seven players.

Maybe It Will Help

I’m usually not very good at this Fantasy Football thing2, but I keep plugging at it. This year I won in the second and sixth weeks, but the rest were losses. I’m about to go down in flames in week seven unless Kirk Cousins throws for 6 touchdowns and passes for 500 yards.

On the back counter of my cubical I have two picture frames that over the years have held various things. Recently there has been my drawing of the CTBNL in front views and side views. Before that there was the Miata & Sonata front views. Because of our new Mini addition I decided to replace the side view of the CTBNL with my recently produced avatar drawing.

As I was getting ready to put the picture in the frame my back door cubical neighbor said, “Hey now that you don’t own the Purple Whale any more, don’t you think you should rename your football team the Ladybugs?” I said, “Ooh, that sounds intimidating.” And it doesn’t, but it got me thinking, how about an angry ladybug? To the Google Cave!

I found a few likely candidates and at first settled on one, but then picked a second one. Before I pay $10 bucks for the image, which one do you like best, left or right?

So, the Purple Whales are now the Angry Ladybugs. Who knows, maybe the name change will alter my fortune, I’ll win out finishing 8 & 5 to make the playoffs.

Quadruple Threat

I’ve got the final stage of the Vuelta a España up on the big screen, the Red Sox baseball game on the “radio”, a window open with ESPN’s FanastyCast keeping track of the Purple Whales vs. the Red Bank Raiders while I’m typing this post.

If you are as impressed with this as I am, buy me something off my Amazon Wishlist. 🙂

Welcome Your 2017 Purple Whales

This afternoon was Draft Day for the EZEFFL. It was the league’s 8th year, my 7th and my 5th & last as Commissioner.

Rnd# Pick# Player Team Pos.
1 Keeper Rob Gronkowski NE TE
2 13 Jay Ajayi Mia RB
3 36 Terrelle Pryor Sr. Wsh WR
4 37 Christian McCaffrey Car RB
5 60 Emmanuel Sanders Den WR
6 61 Kirk Cousins Wsh QB
7 84 Ameer Abdullah Det RB
8 85 Martavis Bryant Pit WR
9 108 Tevin Coleman Atl RB
10 109 Cardinals Ari D/ST
11 132 Willie Snead NO WR
12 133 Mason Crosby GB K
13 156 Carson Wentz Phi QB
14 157 Giants Nyg D/ST

Weekend Round Up

Saturday the CTBNL got an oil change and tire rotation at 49,149 miles.
Saturday the Purple Whale got a bath and a massage at Lulu’s.

Sunday the Miata stayed home and the Sonata went geocaching.
Sunday the fantasy football team named after the Sonata went down for the fifth time this season.

It Was Fun While It Lasted

Playoff Picture

This year’s Purple Whale fantasy football team won its first eight games, lost in Week 9 and then won out finishing 12-1. Week 14 was the first week of the EZEFFL’s playoffs and I had a bye, giving me a week to “rest” my players. So naturally, this past weekend in my first playoff game, I am unceremoniously bounced out, losing by a little over 40 points.

Tonight’s email to the league from the Commish:

All,

It is all down to two teams for the EZEFFL Championship, one of which is the expansion Team McNorrill and the other, Legion of Boom, who has been knocking on the door for the last 3 years. Both teams finished the regular season 8-5 and both won their Division Championship games by 30 points or more. The odds makers in Vegas have placed the early line on the game at under a point, so this should be a great match up.

There are still a couple other games on tap this weekend that are worth watching. The Runner Up Bowl to see who gets a Bronze Medal hung around their neck and of course there will be the hotly contested Consolation Ladder Championship between Team Hofmann and the Bonecrushers.

On a side note, I have decided to adopt a new policy suggested by the Commissioner’s Roster Retention Committee that for next year each team be allowed to keep one player that is on their end of season roster. So start planning now as I’m not sure when exactly the Waiver Wire will shut down business, be it Sunday, Monday or whenever. You might want to check who is out there, even if they are on IR or OUT for the season.

On a personal note, I’ll be rooting for the Legion of Boom to bring it down on the McNorrills. After running up the score on me mercilessly in the Div Champ Game I’m holding a grudge. Plus, I don’t want that every time I look over the back cubical wall, I’ll see the Lenio Trophy prominently exhibited in there.

Brian Bogardus
Commissioner
End Zone Entourage FFL
Owner/Director of Player & Personnel
Purple Whales