Yesterday I received 2 pieces of comment spam on my post about Saturday’s adventures in MMC land. You know what I did? I stripped the fake email address and the referring link to the junk and approved them, they just seemed so nice (and complimentary)…
There were 89 spam messages caught by my spam filter at work this morning and quite a few dealt with trying to sell magic pills to improve my sex life. I am amazed at the creative titles and thought that they could be broken down into which Cable TV channel they would be shown on if they were the titles of infomercials instead of the subject lines of spam.
Release your inside beast! on Animal Planet
African temper in amour on BET
Your prescription for success on Discovery Health
Become arousal athlete! on ESPN
Pumper for pant muscle on Fit TV
Recipe for hot nights on FOOD
Invest in your wang! on CNBC
Be her volcano on National Geographic
Just be a male! on Spike
Right spell for your ‘magic wand’ on SyFy
No sad accidents in bed on Tru TV
Be furious in bed on Versus
I’m not sure what channel these last three belong on, maybe you have some channels I don’t get, let me know what you think:
Be good at humping!
Become a lech instantly
Flaccidity is not for you
I had no less than 5 virus infected emails that started with that subject followed by 15 alphanumeric characters in my work inbox this morning. I have been getting 1 randomly for the last couple of weeks, but today was a big influx and it reminded me I hadn’t written about spam in awhile…
How true, sometimes I *am* totally lost:
Wonder where u are from bbogardus@asco.com (that is my old email address here at work)
Your salary check is probably drawn on a check from Bank of Amireca:
Work Today Paied Tomorrow from Mad.money@FREEAMAZINGHEALTH.INFO
Most popular spam subject was a tie with 4 each:
Heavy Lifting made 50% Lighter, Safer, Easier &
New ARM & HAMMER Whitening Booster – Try it Now
And from the male insecurity department:
Make your manhood tuned from 2 senders
Blow her with your hormones from akosuabelden@asco.com
We offer the best alarm-clocks for your small buddy down there from punkerlg@hhh…hhh
and my favorite
Fertilize your male tree from ayomidebanvard@asco.com
I have been hovering around at a level of 55 spam emails a day here at work, but over the weekend it spiked. One hundred on Saturday and 150 on Sunday. They must really need a lot of Rebate Processors because of the 250 spams I received, one hundred and forty six were promising great pay to do that job, about one every 16 minutes over a 41 hour span.
All of them look like their email addresses were randomly generated in the manner of FirstnameLastname@subdomain.domain.com. Neat but not enough to sneak by Postini.
Actual emails caught in my workplace spam trap.
Half the time twice the erection from seseiopo@HDSMARKETING.COM
Fantastic growth guaranteed from Gabriele-ckmannin@FICAEL.COM.BR
Nursing home abuse! from return@newerpossibilities.com
The biggest meanest bad daddy from lowie-twuots@CRAIGHOMECARE.COM
Wham Bam Thank You Pam from egarekor@BILLPAXTON.NET
Enlargement for dummies from rpnevjiw_1977@VALEXKOREA.COM
Give her the best time from ediool_1963@GLITC.ORG
Harkness private foundation from Kclpv@adelphia.com
Seductive proposal of healthcare. from funna_1967@Umica.plus.com
Paris loves it hard from sadnesse_1953@SUPERVIELLE.COM.AR
Unleash your titan from Heiko-fluitert@14WFIE.com
I love the net. It is a vast repository for everything from diamonds to dreck. I mainly like it for the reason that I don’t have to remember stuff anymore. Brain storage space, now at a premium because of age and heavy abuse of mind altering drugs as a teen, does not have to tied up remember that Jon Provost played Timmy Martin on 178 episodes of the TV show Lassie from 1957 to 1964. And things like, “Although it has been the subject of many spoofs and misquotes, the one situation that Timmy never needed saving from in the entire history of the show was falling down a well.” That’s what IMDB is for. If I ever need to know how to change the fuel filter on my car or how many red Miatas were made in 1993, Miata.net will remember it for me. I don’t even have to remember what happens to me anymore, that is what this blog is for.
I hate the net. The main reason for that is spam. It is light at the home address because I rarely use it on the net. It is just the opposite for my work email. Somewhere along the line that address got sold on a CD and I get about a hundred pieces of crud every day. Fortunately it is stopped before it gets to my inbox by a service the company subscribes to called Postini. I check the MMC‘s email and because we have a yahoo.com address 99.9% of what comes in there is the usual replica watches, male enhancement and free gift card junk. My gamil account gets a bunch too, 27 so far today, but 26 were caught by Gooogle’s spam filter.
Today I received 2 emails at my gmail account purportedly from eBay about “Item Number: (300192365929) Zulu – scarce Stanley Baker signed autograph.” Could this be because of my furious bidding for Lost: Season2 DVDs on eBay? Doubt it, my registered eBay email is still the now defunct brian@mr-miata.com… Both emails contained the right letters to my gmail address, but did not include the dots in between the letters. Do you have a “.” in your gmail address? If so, try sending your self a note by leaving out the dot. Worked for me.
I haven’t written about spam in a long while. Not because I’ve stopped getting it (there is as much chance of that happening as there was of me winning the Miata raffle the other day), but because it has become routine. There hasn’t been anything new since I started getting spam in kanji.
For a while there 2 months ago the Postini report I get for my work address was telling me it was stopping over 200 pieces a day, but now it has fallen to an all time low of around just 25 a day. A few more seem to making it through the filter though, I get 4 or 5 a day when it used to be 4 or 5 a week. How they are getting past is a mystery as they are easily recognizable as spam. I got one this morning that I can see how it made it by, but for the life of me can not figure on its purpose:
From: Assistant [temp5@utlya.com]
Sent: Sunday, December 09, 2007 7:38 PM
To: Bogardus, Brian [ASCO/AK]
Subject: Information, as instructed.Recipe: Overnight Fruit Salad
Ingredients
1 small head cabbage, shredded (about 5 cups)
1 15oz can pineapple chunks, well drained
2 11oz cans mandarin orange sections, drained
2 cups seedless green grapes
1/3 cups light raisins
1 1/2 cups cubed Edam cheese
1 8oz carton lemon yogurt
1 cup dairy sour creamInstructions :
1. Place cabbage on bottom of large salad bowl.
2. Top with pineapple chunks, mandarin orange sections, grapes and raisins. Sprinkle cheese atop.
3. Combine yogurt and sour cream; spread over salad, sealing to edge of bowl.
4. Cover and refrigerate for 4 to 24 hours. If desired, garnish with lemon and lime twist, curly endive, and a grape.
National Association of Cabbage Producers raising awareness?
Del Monte trying to boost sales of canned fruit?
Terrorists delivering a toxin in seedless green grapes?