Size Does Matter
If it didn’t, would they have made Tic-Tacs 30% larger?
Rants
50% Off Coupon
There was a 50% off coupon in today’s paper from Goody’s. I thought goody, I need a new pair of jeans and we were going shopping tonight. Uh, oh, it is only good on Saturday morning from 9AM until 1PM. No problem I can wait. What’s this in the fine print? Good on almost anything in the store! Cool. Excludes clearance, cosmetics, electronics, denim, Dockers, athletic shoes, Goody’s Giftcard purchases, Y.E.S. value items, fine jewelry, fragrances, tuxedos rentals. Shouldn’t that have read “Good on almost nothing in the store!”? Into the trash that coupon goes.
I Am Brian’s Colon
Yesterday I had a colonoscopy boys and girls. You don’t need to look that up in any medical dictionary, colon + scope, means they were looking at my innards from the inside. The worse part is the prep. If you have had it done, you know what I’m talking about and if you haven’t, I don’t want to spoil the fun.
During the actual procedure they sedate you and depending on who you talk to who has had it done, that means anything from knocked out to partly aware. When the nurse put the needle full of fuzzy juice into the IV she said to me, “Now think of someplace pleasant you would like to be.” I started to decide which place I thought I would like when the next thing I knew I was coming to in the recovery area. And when I say coming to, I really mean just peeking my head above the fog.
The next few hours I was in and out. I remember my wife feeding me cookies and a Diet Dr. Pepper. My next memory is of being helped out of the wheelchair into the Miata. There is a brief window into lucidity at the CVS where I picked out a book to read. I remember reading some of it during my doctor prescribed bath. I read a little more on the couch before putting it down to go take a 2 hour nap. I was “sedated” at around 1:30 and it wasn’t until around 7:30 that continuous memory was regained. When I went in tonight to get the book I kind of figured that I would have to start all over reading it again, I did, but I didn’t have far to go, the dog eared page marking where I stopped last night was page number two.
Mmm…Pain Pills
Had a minor outpatient procedure done at the hospital today. After driving myself there, Donna had to drive me home and as a special treat she put the top down for me. I love driving the Miata, but it sure was fun over in the right seat too. You get to see so much more and until they start making those George Jetson bubble roof cars you poor suckers in your SUVs will have to lead much shallower lives.
With apologies to Brian Damage:
[x] I’ve been banded
[ ] I’ve not been banded
I hope it doesn’t take three weeks to recover again, but I know that is wishful thinking because I am just a slow healer.
Fuzzy Math
This afternoon we went over to Rader Mazda to have the car’s 7500 mile service done. When I called and made the appointment the other day I asked how much it was going to be. It is a glorified oil change, but they inspect a bunch of stuff and rotate the tires. I was told it would be $74 and change. About what I figured. I saved a coupon the dealer had sent me earlier, so I’d get 10% off that to boot. When the car was finished and it was time to settle the bill they told me it was $72.13. About right I thought, 74 + tax – 10% = $72 and change.
When we got home I looked at the invoice. Huh? Mazda “B” service, Labor $108 (1-1/2 hours), parts $21.09 (oil, filter, gasket and something called SOLVENT,WIND) and tax $1.48 for a grand total of $130.57. How come I paid only $72.13 and how did they arrive at that figure?
It’s All My Fault
or I’m a Jinx Part II
Back in October 2003 in Episode I I single handedly knocked the Red Sox out of a sure World Series berth. This year I started earlier in the season. I had the bright idea that I could relive the joys of my youth by listening to the radio broadcasts of the Red Sox games (but on the internet this time.) When I signed up the Bosox were 4 games ahead of the Yankees in the standings, now after just 2-1/2 weeks they are about to be just a 1/2 game ahead. Real disappointing as they usually wait until late June to fall from first to behind their arch-rivals, but now it looks a lot like it will happen in early May…
Pop Up Ads
On the newspaper?!? One day last week when I opened my newspaper there was a 3″ x 3″ low tack glossy sticky note announcing the newspaper’s new program about paying your bill online. I thought nothing of it until today when there was another on the front of the paper. This one was for a Tobacco Use Prevention Program touting giving up smoking for Mother’s day as a gift. OK that is a public service announcement, but I bet commercials are definitely next.
On a quasi-related note, I saw something tonight that Major League Baseball has agreed to place a diamond shaped ad for the movie “Spiderman II” on all the bases, plus in the on deck circles, on a certain weekend in June. Not that ads and sporting events have never gotten together before, but this just seems a bit much to me.