We arrived in Martinsville, VA about 12:30 PM and stopped at the Holiday Inn Express to see if per chance we could check in. We could and did. Donna had a hankering for Chik-fil-A and we wondered aloud what the odds were that we could find one in this town. The helpful desk clerk said take a right out of the parking lot, at the second light go left and the mall is on your left about a mile down the road.
The mall was an older one, built probably during the hay-day of malls, in the early 80’s. There was no food court, just a fast pizza place and the Chik-fil-A. The Chik-fil-A was packed and the lines were long. Turns out it wasn’t so much the lines to order, but they were people who had already placed an order and were waiting on their food. Trying to politely decipher which was which was impossible. We considered leaving to find someplace to go, but figured a short wait wouldn’t be too bad. Not too long after we decided to stay a clerk called out, “I’ll help the next one in line.” I started towards her, but a woman came from nowhere and proceeded to order her lunch. Donna and I looked at one another and promptly did an about face and headed for our car.
Back towards the hotel there were a few places, so we headed that way. We spotted an Applebee’s, but hesitated. We like the food, but dislike them because they separate the smoking and non-smoking sections by an imaginary line and a thin railing. To make matters worse the bar and smoking section are on a lower level making a nice chimney effect to draw the exhaled smoke and smell right into the non-smoking section. Deciding to give them a chance anyway because we were getting hungry. I got into the turn lane and waited for the arrow. Looking left there was an entrance to a steak place to the right of Applebee’s that was closed, so I made a U-turn and got in the right lane looking for the other entrance only to realize that the entrance I saw was for both places. I drove a quarter of a mile back the wrong way, U-turned again, returned to the original light and waited for the green arrow again. The hostess seated us against the wall on one in response to our request to be as far from the smoking section as possible. Maybe it was just inattentiveness or perhaps we had broken an unwritten hostess rule by requesting special seating, but there we sat ignored. After no one came over to greet us or take a drink order within the first couple of minutes, using the silent communication that married couples develop in time, we discussed leaving with just a glance. I said out loud, “Wait here comes a waitress, if she isn’t ours, we’ll leave.” She paraded slowly by without so much as a glance our way. We headed for our car once again.
Up ahead was a Ryan’s Steakhouse, complete with a woman out front in a poorly made cow costume waving at the drivers as they blew past her at 55 MPH. Unfortunately our survival instincts overrode our good sense and we pulled in, even though we knew what was in store for us inside. Both of us really didn’t want steak for lunch so we chose to dine on the Mega-Bar. What started out as a simple salad bar 10 years ago, has transmogrified into a buffet of immense proportions which includes every thing you could possibly think of, except salad. The variety of fried food stuffs is only out numbered by the quantity of vegetables that have been cooked and swimming in butter or prepared with animal fat as a seasoning. To be honest there was the makings of a tossed salad to be had, but by the time I found it, I was so full of chicken wings, fried okra, etc. to not want any.
