Year: 2009

Wonder Where My Wonder Bread Went?

Now that Hats Off To Caching in SC is in the field, and found, it is time to think about hiding another. My new favorite caching inspiration, Renzo Tobias, has second puzzle for a mystery cache on his site that I think I might imitate called Grocery List. He used it on a cache called Food Glorious Food and it has a way of checking if your coordinates are correct, so this way we would know if the answers we come up with are right and then we can build our own version.

As usual when we went through the questions, I got some right off, Donna got some quickly and we struggled over a couple. Tonight we did our weekly grocery shopping and as well as picking up the stuff we needed, we shopped for the items we solved for on Renzo’s grocery list to find out what number the given ingredient was, so we could solve the puzzle.

Kroger didn’t carry our answer to clue ‘C’: Not a cracker nor will it help change a tire. But a visit to the Cracker Jack’s web site told me that soy lecithin was ingredient number 9.

Clue ‘H’ reads: Curiously the red, blue, and yellow spots make us hand over extra dough? Kroger also doesn’t stock Wonder Bread, so if you are out shopping and your local store carries WB leave the ingredient number niacin is in the comments.

Started down, went up, back down, still down.
Miata Top Transitions since 10/24/08: 326

This Is Sad

At the MMC monthly meeting tonight everyone seemed to enjoy themselves. Most of the time was spent on future event planning, where we hammered out the details for the next couple of month’s. Like what restaurant we would be holding the next 2 meetings at and where we would meet for the monthly breakfast. Then something odd happened, one member had the audacity to suggest a car related event…

When I got home from the meeting I turned on the ballgame and the FRS were beating the MFY 3 to 1 after 3-1/2 innings. The Yankees then scored 8 runs in the bottom of the 4th inning and it has been downhill every since. I wonder if it is too early to call in sick for tomorrow?

Started down, still down.
Miata Top Transitions since 10/24/08: 324

High School Reunion

My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table.

My wife asked, “Do you know her?”

“Yes,” I sighed, “She’s my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn’t been sober since.”

“My God!” says my wife, “who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?”

Applying For Social Security

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver’s license to verify my age… I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.

The woman said, “Unbutton your shirt.” So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, “That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me.” She processed my Social Security application.

When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office.

She said, “You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too.”

Foul Weather Fisherman

Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day.

I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife’s back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, “The weather out there is terrible.”

My loving wife of 10 years replied, “Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?”

I Know It When I See It

Let’s talk porn, in honor of my two recent posts on the subject thanks to io9, the scifi (not syfy) site I read every day. They are part of network of sites that cover various subjects, one of which is about the biggest money maker on the net, porn. So every time there is anything remotely about science fiction over on Fleshbot it gets cross posted on io9.

At my age pornography has lost a lot of its luster. Notice I didn’t say all of it, I’m not above checking out some of the posts on Fleshbot when io9 links them, but I don’t have the site bookmarked or anything. There is nothing like that first thrill of finding your dad’s Playboy at 12 or several years later a friend discovers some black and white 8mm stag films in his basemen. When I was in the Navy there was a co-worker who knew where you could get XXX on VHS. On Saturdays I would carry my VCR over to his house and we would both make a copy a movie. He was trying to amass a collection, I was just using the same tape and copying over last weeks movie.

It was the last six months in the Navy that removed most of the luster off of porn for me. My final duty station was aboard the U.S.S. Iwo Jima as an E6, or Petty Officer First Class. We had a 1st Class Mess, which was basically a small room on the Mess Deck, where we could eat our meals, take a coffee/smoke break or just spend our downtime reading or playing Acey Duecy. There was a TV mounted in high up in one corner of the room, so we could watch Armed Forces TV. The TV also had a VCR attached so we could watch movies. There was a selection of current releases if you were interested, but by far the largest collection of tapes were of the XXX variety.

Who ever the guy was that was in charge of movies really liked the hard core stuff. Every, and any, time you went into the mess that corner of the room was filled with incessant moaning and close ups of genitalia. Try to eat eggs over easy and sausage links at 5 AM or hot dogs at lunch with that going on in the background, it sort of takes the pleasure out of both activities…

Started down, went up, still up.
Miata Top Transitions since 10/24/08: 323

Now They’ve Gone An’ Done It

Scully & Mulder?About a month and a half ago I wrote about a new Star Trek porn parody and how if you looked you could get practically any TV show from any era done in the same way. Now I’m a big Star Trek fan and was slightly tempted to see if I could find a way to download it out of curiosity, but come September I may not be able to resist this one. There is a release from a company called New Sensations that looks mighty intriguing – The X Files: A Dark Parody (announcement on a page that is NSFW or homes with small children.) Never really wanted to Uhura and Spock get it on, but Scully & Mulder, that was a different story, they were the ultimate long tease.

Started up, went down, went up, back down, still down.
Miata Top Transitions since 10/24/08: 322