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FM

Wednesday, December 31, 2003

Today while over running the Master’s Miata Club‘s newsletter through the postage meter at the dealer, I mentioned the ugly spots on the outside rearview mirrors to the salesman and he said, “I know just what you need.” We walked around back to the detailing area and he grabbed a white bottle with no label on it. Poured some clear viscous fluid on a white rag. We went back over to where the car was parked and he swirled some on the mirror, let it sit while he swirled some on the other mirror. Got a clean rag and wiped/rubbed off the stuff from both mirrors. Spots all gone.

When I asked him what it was, he said, “I don’t know, we call it ‘water spot remover’.”

I call it Fucking Magic

Tagged: Miatatude

Toilet Stall Entertainment

Monday, December 29, 2003

This morning while sitting in a stall at work (I always go at work. Why do it at home when you can get paid for it?) I noticed a fingernail clipping laying near my shoe. At first, I was somewhat repulsed, but then marveled at the nicely symmetrical nature of the clipping. It was kind of large, so it must have been a thumb….crap! Did it just move? Naw, I must be hallucinating. No wait, there it goes again. WTF? It is then I notice that there is a tiny little ant under one end. He is valiantly trying to get that sucker back to all his buddies back in Antville. First he swings it one way, then back another. He is struggling mightily. I watch transfixed for a couple of minutes while he makes very little organized progress, he keeps at it, so there must be some good food stuck to the nail. My business is finished, so I leave the ant to his. That was much more entertaining than the occasional folded up sports page….

Tagged: Food, Rants

Minty Fresh

Monday, December 29, 2003

When I posted my query about the permanent water spots on my mirrors over on the Miata.net forum I got one response: “I used Meguire’s Number 7 polish followed by Meguire’s Gold Class car wax.” Having neither of these products, but it got me thinking, what else I could use? I remembered that toothpaste is a very low abrasive that can be used as a light polish. So I took a tube out to the garage and swirled away for a while then washed with Windex.

I don’t think it worked very well, but at least my mirrors smell minty fresh. 🙂

Tagged: Miatatude

Baby Gets A Bath

Sunday, December 28, 2003

Finally bought some car wash soap and gave baby a bath. After only a month it has outgrown the kitchen sink so I had to do it in the driveway. Several neighbors stopped by to say, “Oooh, nice car. Is it new?”

Noticed a bitsy paint chip missing off the hood, so small you’d hardly notice it, but it is the first scar it’s gotten while in my possession. I also noticed that the outside rearview mirrors look like they have water spots all over them. At first I thought it was because I didn’t dry them off after the wash, but Windex nor 409 removed them. Hmmm. Acid rain spots? I wonder if the mirror is actually plastic? The car finish doesn’t have anything like that on it.

Tagged: Miatatude

Pulp Reading

Friday, December 26, 2003

We went out today and burned up the gift cards received for Xmas (and some of our own ready cash as well.) Started at 6:30 AM with breakfast at Best Bagels and then we hit the After Christmas sales. First up was Lowes to see about a prelighted Christmas tree, no go. All they had left were 12′ trees and we don’t have a ceiling that high. We shopped Aiken and then we headed over to the big town of Augusta. We were not successful on the tree front, struck out on Christmas salt & pepper shakers, but did manage to get next year’s cards and some various sundry items at half price.

Didn’t seem like there was that many people out or stores open or merchandise left over this year as there has been the last few years.

I did snag some hardcover books at Borders. They had a “Buy 2 Bargain Books and Get a 3rd Free” thing happening and I’m a wait until they are as cheap as paperbacks kinda a guy.

Already halfway through “Widow’s Walk” by Robert B. Parker. Probably finish it tonight, the Spenser books are such easy reads. Like eating a whole bag of potato chips, slick, salty, not really good for you, but definitely a pleasure.

Tagged: Rants

Thanks Brian, A Well Turned Dictum*

Thursday, December 25, 2003

Please accept — with no obligation, implied or implicit — my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable tradition of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your preference. In addition, please enjoy a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2004.

*Stolen directly from Brian Damage

Tagged: Rants

'Twas the Night Before Christmas

Wednesday, December 24, 2003

or Account of a Visit from St. Nicholas
by Major Henry Livingston Jr. (1748-1828)
(previously believed to be by Clement Clarke Moore)

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads;
And mamma in her ‘kerchief, and I in my cap,
Had just settled down for a long winter’s nap,

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below,
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer,

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

“Now, DASHER! now, DANCER! now, PRANCER and VIXEN!
On, COMET! on CUPID! on, DONDER and BLITZEN!
To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!”

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,
So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,
With the sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.
As I drew in my hand, and was turning around,
Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound.

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;
A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a peddler just opening his pack.

His eyes — how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow;

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath;
He had a broad face and a little round belly,
That shook, when he laughed like a bowlful of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And filled all the stockings; then turned with a jerk,
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose;

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,
“HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, AND TO ALL A GOOD-NIGHT!”

Tagged: Rants
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sturgeon’s law

"Ninety Percent Of Everything Is Crap"
Derived from a quote by science fiction author Theodore Sturgeon, who once said, "Sure, 90% of science fiction is crud. That's because 90% of everything is crud." Oddly, when Sturgeon's Law is cited, the final word is almost invariably changed to 'crap'.

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