South Carolina Math Test

SHOW ALL WORK!

  1. Calculate the smallest limb diameter on a persimmon tree that will support a 10 pound possum.
  2. Which of these cars will rust out the quickest when placed on blocks in your front yard?
    (A) ’65 Ford Fairlane ( B) ’69 Chevrolet Chevelle (C) ’64 Pontiac GTO.
  3. If your uncle builds a still which operates at a capacity of 20 gallons of shine produced per hour, how many car radiators are required to condense the product?
  4. A woodcutter has a chainsaw which operates at 2700 RPM. The density of the pine trees in the plot to be harvested is 470 per acre. The plot is 2.3 acres in size. The average tree diameter is 14 inches. How many Budweisers will be drunk before the trees are cut down?
  5. A front porch is constructed of 2×8 pine on 24-inch centers with a field rock foundation. The span is 8 feet and the porch length is 16 feet. The porch floor is 1-inch rough sawn pine. When the porch collapses, how many dogs will be killed?
  6. A man owns a house and 3.7 acres of land in a hollow with an average slope of 15%. The man has five children. Can each of his grown children place a mobile home on the man’s land and still have enough property for their electric appliances to sit out front?
  7. A 2-ton truck is overloaded and proceeding 900 yards down a steep slope on a secondary road at 45 MPH. The brakes fail. Given average traffic conditions on secondary roads, what is the probability that it will strike a vehicle with a muffler?
  8. With a gene pool reduction of 7.5% per generation, how long will it take a town which has been bypassed by the Interstate to breed a country-western singer?

Now I’m Lost

Totally lost! One of my wife’s co-workers talked her into wanting to see “Lost.” I heard the buzz about the show last year, but I’m not into TV much anymore, so I never watched it. I added Season 1: Disc 1 to the Netflix queue and it arrived today.

So instead of watching Rachel Ray cook on “30 Minute Meals” as usual with supper, we watched part one of the pilot episode. A couple of leaps of faith were required right in the begining, besides the whole plunge from 40,000 feet and living part, but it wasn’t too bad. So we watched part two, then the next episode and the next. Before you know it we were through the whole DVD. Helps that each episode is only 40 minutes long without the commercials. So now if you look at my rental queue to the right, you will see the rest of the “Lost” discs in a row.

Started up, went down, still down.
Miata Top Transitions since 01/01/06: 26

A Picture Is Worth A 1,000 Words

And sometimes a good chuckle.

Inside the Miata’s Birth Announcement was a photograph of the proud father and his new baby. Check that pose, I guess that was what I thought was cool. Looks a little too much like an awkward teen aged boy who “just happened” to be hanging around the malt shop hoping to get noticed by that car load of cheerleaders.

Started up, still up.
Miata Top Transitions since 01/01/06: 25

Birth Announcement

Way back in 1989 when I decided to buy a Miata, it wasn’t as easy as walking into a Mazda dealer and choosing a car off the lot. You can read the story, Brian Buys A Miata some other time, this is the story of what happened once I finally got the car.

I had been keeping some folks appraised of my quest, so when it was finally realized I felt I should let them know that too. I felt like a proud parent, so I thought a cute idea might be a birth announcement. Using what limited tools I had available, AutoCAD and a copy machine, you can see what I made:

Birth Announcement Outside

Birth Announcement Inside

This particular copy was sent to Donna’s mom and came out of yesterday’s dig through the Big Box of Morrison Memories. You can see that Donna wasn’t as thrilled as I was, she modified the outside of the announcement a little.

Started down, went up, still up.
Miata Top Transitions since 01/01/06: 25

Just When I Thought That I Was Out, They Pull Me Back In

I thought I was cured. I has been almost two years years since I posted a picture. Actually, when I converted to WordPress I deleted any of those old picture posts. I haven’t been to a GAA meeting in at least a year and a half.

In the January 25th issue of People Magazine there was a familiar face looking out at me from the TV Picks & Pans section. There was the same picture on the cover of the free TV magazine in this morning’s paper. For the next 6 weeks on PBS’s Masterpiece Theater she will be starring in an adaptation of Charles Dickens’s “Bleak House.” Jeez, “Fight the Future” was on FX this morning too.

I guess now I’m going have to check and see when the next local meeting of Gillian Anderson Anonymous is.

I Still Miss Sharona

Donna, Sandy & DogCaught an episode of Monk on the tube this afternoon and the cute little Téa Lenoni look alike just doesn’t cut it. I still miss Sharona.

For tonight’s excitement we dipped into the Big Box of Morrison Memories. I scanned about a dozen photos for Donna to email a cousin that is also doing the whole genealogy thing too. While I was at, it I also scanned a few more photos for a small book we are doing for her brothers and sister that will be filled with pictures from the past. Including the one above showing Donna’s early predilection for riding around in convertibles. From July 1972, her younger sister Sandy (who now also drives a Miata) at the wheel and the family dog in the back seat of a VW Bug, Donna smiles for the camera.

Started down, went up, back down, still down.
Miata Top Transitions since 01/01/06: 24

Pay Your Bills

A long time ago in a far away land lived Nicholas the Dragon Slayer who was a member of the King?s court. He had a long-standing obsession to nuzzle the beautiful Queen’s voluptuous breasts, but he knew the penalty for this would be death.

One day he revealed his secret desire to his colleague, Grymbald the Physician, who was the King’s chief doctor. Grymbald the Physician exclaimed that he could arrange for Nicholas the Dragon Slayer to satisfy his desire, but it would cost him 1,000 gold coins to arrange it.

Without pause, Nicholas the Dragon Slayer readily agreed to have Grymbald the Physician arrange it and that he would gladly pay the 1,000 gold coins for the chance to satisfy his desires for the Queen.

The next day, Grymbald the Physician made a batch of itching powder and poured a little bit into the Queen’s brassiere while she was taking a bath. Soon after she dressed, the itching commenced and grew intense.

Upon being summoned to the Royal Chambers to address this incident, Grymbald the Physician informed the King and Queen that only a special saliva, if applied for four hours, would cure this type of itch, and that tests had shown that only the saliva of Nicholas the Dragon Slayer had present the antidote to cure the itch. The King quickly summoned Nicholas the Dragon Slayer.

Grymbald the Physician then slipped Nicholas the Dragon Slayer the antidote for the itching powder, which he quickly put it into his mouth, and for the next four hours, worked passionately on the Queen’s magnificent breasts. The Queen’s itching was eventually relieved, and Nicholas the Dragon Slayer left satisfied and as a hero.

Upon returning to his chamber, Nicholas the Dragon Slayer found Grymbald the Physician demanding his payment of 1,000 gold coins. With his obsession now satisfied, Nicholas the Dragon Slayer couldn’t have cared less, and knowing that Grymbald the Physician could never report this matter to the King – shooed him away with no payment made.

The next day, Grymbald the Physician slipped a massive dose of the same itching powder into The King’s loincloth. The King quickly summoned Nicholas the Dragon Slayer…

Moral of the story – pay your bills!

Started down, went up, back down, still down.
Miata Top Transitions since 01/01/06: 22