Sometimes I think Trump is just trolling America.
Donna had to pick up a prescription at Kroger’s today and while she was there she also opted to pick up literally a couple other items, some bananas and some watermelon. You can pay for other stuff at the Pharmacy counter, but not anything that is sold by the pound — no scale. So after paying there she headed over to the self-checkout. The two purchases came to a whopping $2.75, so instead of check or debit card, cash was called for. She slipped a ten dollar bill into the slot and instead of the expected seven and a quarter, she got $22.25!
Donna called the attendant over and pointed out the error and told him maybe they should shut the machine down and check it out. He took her offered $20 bill and gave her a five back. She was raised right.
Me, I’d have slipped all the change in my pocket and walked slowly out the door, whistling softly to myself. Which makes me a perfect candidate to fill one of the 39 out of 46 top science posts in the Trump administration. I was in the Navy, maybe I could get one of those 48 of a possible 53 Pentagon openings. How about one of those 56 open Ambassadorships? But seriously, with that kind of shady ethics I think I’d be best suited for a job on the board of the Eric Trump Foundation.
Every Monday since the end of January I have looked at what was tweeted by @realDonaldTrump and @SenSanders over the weekend, printed out a choice one from each for my political action figures to hold up. It has been great fun choosing something off the map of normal Presidential behavior from The Donald and some well thought out, on-point rebuttal, from the Bernie.
But recently, I think that the IT wizards in the White House have figured out how to intercept Mr. Trump’s tweets and replace them with, well, something an adult high ranking public figure might tweet, then somehow make sure that he sees what ever nonsense he blurted out on his devices only. Bernie’s tweets on the other hand have gone full tilt boogie to the left-wingnut realm: Free College! Free Health Care! Big Paychecks for Everyone!
Because we had visitors from corporate tour the Valve Store last Friday (a Masters Tournament by-product) I stashed my pint-sized plastic political pontificators in a desk draw. Monday morning when I went looking for fresh tweets, I was so frustrated by the reversal in tone from the two that I put them back on my window sill without a tweet card held high. Then as the day wore on and I explained why no tweets to the 3 or 4 people who asked, it dawned on me that I aiding and abetting the social divide that has got this country all out of whack by presenting just my point of view. So in an effort to help heal and to perhaps Really Make America Great Again by showing bi-partisanism, I found a couple worthy entries for my dynamic duo diorama.
An excerpt from President Trump’s first solo press conference yesterday:
NBC’s Peter Alexander: Mr. President, very simply you said today that you had the biggest electoral margin since Ron Reagan. In fact, president Obama had 365,
President Trump: I was talking about Republicans—
Alexander: George Bush, 426 when he won. So why should Americans trust—
President Trump: I was given that information. I was just given it. We had a very, very big margin.
Alexander: I guess my question is why should the American people trust you when you accuse the information they receive as being fake when you’re providing information that’s not accurate?
President Trump: I was given that information. Actually, I’ve seen that information around. But it was a very substantial victory. Do you agree with that?
Alexander: You’re the president.
President Trump: Yes.
Growing up I remember my mom watching the network evening news and getting so upset at whatever was happening in the country and world that she would literal shout out her disgust at Chet Huntley or David Brinkley or both. I remember thinking what good does that do?
Donna likes to watch the network evening news, so if I’m in the room, by proxy I do too. We watch ABC because she liked to watch Diane Sawyer when she was the anchor, but we are still watching ABC long after she is gone. Diane used to always start the program by saying, “BREAKING NEWS!” even though it was only breaking if you didn’t have access to a 24hr news channel or the internet. I think the breaking news qualifier for them could be added if it happened since their broadcast ended the night before.
When David Muir took over I was hoping that he would drop the charade, but no, he’s even amped it up a notch. Plus he has continued the ridiculous “the Index” feature, 4 or 5 stories hyped at every chance during the first 20 minutes of the broadcast. They are the television version of clickbait, eight to ten word headlines that make you want to find out what they are about. They are saved until near the end and you get one 10 second Index item followed by a minute and half of commercials for prescription drugs your insurance won’t cover the cost of. Then another tidbit and another 2 minutes of commercials, rinse and repeat until it is time to see what the daily lottery numbers are.
It used to be just watch the show and listen with 1/4 of our concentration letting the news wash over us, but since what’s his name took over the news cycle over a year ago, that has been impossible. We don’t shout at the TV, but Donna has taken to sighing a lot and I cussing non-verbally in my mind. Now that the hirsute yellow-fin tuna has taken office Donna’s sighing is becoming words of disbelief and I’ve started muttering incoherently. It is only a matter of time until one of us turns into my mother and starts shouting at the TV.
I’m hear to tell you, it won’t be me. From now on if I join her on the couch anytime between 6:30 and 7:00 PM I will have my headphones on listening to Radio Paradise and staring at my Kindle.
Because it is Friday and no one will probably notice, I figure I’ll be safe with my new Over Reaction figure in this particular pose, but come Monday his right hand will be down by his side and in his left will be up high holding up a quote/tweet of his that I find particularly interesting. This way it will appear as he is in a debate with my other political action figure, the Senator from Vermont, Bernie Sanders, who is already there holding one of his quotes/tweets.
I’ve still got my Bernie Sanders action figure sitting on my desk and every Monday I have been writing one of Mr. Sander’s quotes on the back of a business card and taping it to his upraised left hand. Today a co-worker wandered by, checked out the quote and wondered out loud if their was a Trump action figure. Being the ever helpful person I am, I mentioned that the folks who made the Bernie figure had an April Fools joke about making one in the vein of Darth Vader. I said, “I wonder if they are going to make one of Trump now that he was elected?” “They started with a Hillary one in 2008 and when Barack Obama was elected they commissioned one of him” “Why not a Donald?”
So I went to the FCTRY site and sure as crap, they are going to do a Trump figure. They are calling it an Over Reaction Figure and taking pre-orders. Expected delivery of some time before the inauguration. Well…I just had to get one. I can replace the Bernie figure with the Donald and place some of his memorable tweets on a card in his hand.